I am such a jerk.

Remember last Friday I described that woman who said she was in love with me? Well, the truth is… and the truth when it comes to me always hurts… she said she loved me while I was still portraying a woman. Yeah, you heard right. I pretended to be a woman, I pretended to be a lesbian, and now I face the consequences of it.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve already told her the truth. She knows that I’m not what she thought I was. What she doesn’t know is what I look like, and everything else about me. She does know my first name, as well as my email address, though, which is what scares me a little. I think she’s better than me, though. I would have stalked my love interests on the Net and dug up just about anything and everything I could. How do you think I found Tessa’s blog anyway?

But coming back to my online lover. I’ve decided to play it slow. She seems to be genuinely nice to me, and I don’t want to rush things. Frankly, I don’t know what she sees in me, and I don’t know what I see in her. If anything, experience has told me that it’s a relationship bound for disaster, but I’m feeling optimistic about this. Hopefully I don’t say or do something I’d regret.

Personally, I’ve never believed in online relationships, not since Secondary 3 when I had one, and though we later became rather good friends, our “first” meeting always embarrassed the hell outta me. healer (aka caduceus), if you ever read this blog, I do want to see you again–I was a jerk the last time we met, and I want to apologise to you and start over.

Again, as ever, if you have comments, suggestions, advice or just plain ranting for me, email me.

Dear all,

I was going to gush about last night’s YES! but I’ve just received news that Left-Eye Lopes of R&B group TLC passed away after her SUV crashed in Honduras.

In tribute to her and her band-sisters in TLC, I hope you will all join me in a special silent moment.

More information can be found on CNN and MTV.

Hello again and welcome to my blog. Today is the morning of the day when our hard work put into YES! (the Youth Exam Service I mentioned last week) will pay off, with God’s grace. Yep, tonight is when some 60 young people (we fervently hope) will come together before the Blessed Sacrament and be restored in faith and hope. YES! will be a success. Everything so far has pointed to it, and those involved in this project can feel God’s Hand in it all.

In today’s Life! Section of The Straits Times, there’s a typical article about blogging. I’m quite surprised Tessa didn’t write it, considering how she did the item comparison section as well as the roam-the-street column. Perhaps they rotate on what each on writes every week. Who knows. Perhaps Tessa didn’t let on about her blog. She’s cute that way.

Coming to the reason why I’m penning this blog in the first place. I’m going to talk about online love. Yep, you heard me right. How does this oxymoron apply to me, and what do I know about it at all? Listen on. DISCLAIMER: If you are not an open-minded person who is willing to accept everything with a pinch of salt, don’t read on. If you have certain distastes towards online chatting, friendships or deeper relationships, don’t read on. If you are my parents, please don’t read on!

Piqued your interest? Here goes. A woman has claimed she loves me, online. I must admit, this comes as a shock to me, as it must to many of you who know me even remotely. Yes, I’ve never been told this before. I’ve told others this, and others have said they love me as a friend (which by the way, was NOT what I wanted to hear at the time, but on hindsight, was the best thing to happen to me). But this woman actually claims she loves me. Think there’s a catch? Good guess, and here’s where I get to embarrass myself again.

I told you about my incestuous feelings earlier, right? Well, in this sick pathetic mind of mine, there’s a lot more kinks going on. Weird how sin can take root in one’s mind and then grow uncontrollably. Now it’s ALMOST every man’s fantasy to see two beautiful women make love to each other. That’s obvious, when you consider that heterosexual intercourse and female homosexual intercourse are just about the only two themes 98% of pornographic material consist of. So anyway, that’s more or less one of my fantasies too, but I think it’s gone a lot deeper than that. My lust for lesbians has turned into a veritable obsession.

After a 15 day long hiatus… (if you don’t know what I’ve been doing these 15 days, I suggest you check out THoR right now! Checked it out? Yeah, so it’s not been updated for the past 5 days… sue me. I’ve been busy.

Busy with what? Well, members of the Youth Council from the church I attend, Holy Family, have gotten together to prepare for a Youth Exam Service (affectionately shortened to YES!). It’s going to be held next Friday the 26th of April, so we’re currently in the midst of back-breaking work, tinkering the nitty gritty details so that our young people can worship the Lord knowing that He gives a peace the world cannot give.

Now what came over me that time? Weird.

Anyway, I’m really writing this blog because Hell’s Kitchen (you remember the guy from the Forums) has insisted that I continue with my online ramblings. Well, “Kitty”, you got your wish. You know, it’s weird that everytime I mention a person on this blog, they come and read it… okay… so maybe only two out of four people came and read it but it’s cool anyway.

Did I mention I’m easily amused?

Anyway, just a quick recap. (1) Tessa’s accused me of stalking her… but not in the way you think… check out her blog to find out what I mean. (2) My Da Jie has informed me that she’ll has applied to attend the Basic Airborne Course that the instructors in my camp provides, which means that, if everything goes well and her application is approved, I’ll get to see a whole lot more of her, which unfortunately, may not always be a good thing. (3) My JC class has made preparations for a class outing, so I’ll get to meet all the people who didn’t desert us and go overseas to study.

All in all, my life is good… for a conscripted clerk.

Hellooo out there. Just to let you wonderful people know that I have decided to foray into the dread and dangerous world of HTML programming. Yep… till I discovered Macromedia Dreamweaver 4, that is… only trouble is (gee whiz… I’m dreamin’ my life away….NOT) I installed it only last night, and therefore have not had the time to test it out yet. Oh well.

Check out the ONE flash button on my homepage–The Home of Righteousness.

Three-Thirteen Productions is a debut project that the creative geniuses of myself and two old friends have come up with. Check out what they did with theirs at –Direcow.cow and Temporary Inanity. It’s a lot better than mine, I promise.

Upcoming plans for The Home of Righteousness (or THoR as I shall call it) include: Putting up my fanfiction writings and a in-depth review of the Marvel MAX title U.S. War Machine Book 1. Also, a possible link to this blog would be in order. Any more suggestions? Email me.